Well, not really, but I have a healthy imagination. I constantly log into my WordPress account to see who is reading my nonsense and I love it when I get a new international hit. I’m sure most of them are accidental (the one from India came via a Google search for “screaming Shiva tattoo”) but I ignore logic and tell myself that I’m an internationally recognized author.
It doesn’t have a damn thing to do with anything, but I’m listening to “It’s On” by Easy-E right now. I need noise when I write and absolute silence when I read. Weird.
Lately, I’ve been getting a pretty steady amount of traffic from the Russian Federation. I guess I should qualify that; seven hits for me equals “steady”. I’ve only had 1000 people visit this site and I’m sure some of the better advertised blogs get that on a daily basis, but I plan on wearing this indie and obscure thing like a comfortable corduroy coat.
Who is this Russian? Is it more than one Russian? I picture a well-to-do aristocratic type that still wears one of those old-school beaver hats for the ironic value. You know, an intellectual that sips coffee as he trudges through the snow; a Kremlin hipster. That’d be rad. Hell, maybe its Aliya Mustafina or Vladimir Putin. I’m obsessed with the Olympics and intrigued by powerful foreign politicians so that’s naturally where my mind wanders (and I’d be hard pressed to name another Russian). Did you know Putin has a black belt in Judo? It really adds to that whole “scary dictator” thing don’t ‘cha think?
Anyway, I want to know, and that’s why I wrote this. If you’re reading this, and you’re a Russian, please send me an email: firstname.lastname@example.org I promise that I won’t be disappointed if you’re not a badass gymnast with a permanent pout or a despot ninja.