I have pictures of my daughters and descriptions of my personal life throughout this blog. True, it’s mostly asinine nonsense, but there are morsels of information that actually matter to me. Statistically speaking, at least one creep has stumbled upon my writing and my pictures and I’m not sure how I feel about that.
I recently discovered that WordPress has a feature that lists all the search terms that’ve been entered into engines which led to your site. I’ve decided to list the top 22 terms that directed some stranger to read my blog. Sure, it’s interesting, but in reality, it’s my wife’s birthday and we’re going to the pool so I don’t have time to write something longer like I usually would on a Sunday. I narrowed it down to 22 by omitting some of the more banal terms; there are a few others I wanted to leave out because they seem too vulgar to associate with anything I’ve written, but I really want you to get a feel for the type of people that have read what you’re reading. And yes, these terms are listed in order of usage (the first ten or so were used multiple times which is a bit scary):
Green eyed child
Trailer Park Juggernauts.
Free people own guns slaves don’t
Girl boy nude finger penis cum
Impregnating my daughter
Quake visor green skin
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth
Bind self with tape
One pant leg rolled up sweatpants
Locked in the closet naked
The Velveteen Maraca
Wife duct tape me in the closet
Bugs that live in the mud with pinchers on their butts
Digging holes for farming trees in the suburbs
Modern apt thirty something
Chris Stokes sex picture
See what I mean? If you’ve read my blog before, hopefully you’ll be just as confused as I am as to how some of these terms were linked with my writing via the internet. Seriously, what the hell were some of these people hoping to find? Whatever. I’m off to the pool.